Shopping: The New British Religion

It’s December, 26th. Boxing day in early nineteenth century Britain. Boxes of presents and food are being passed from lords to servants, and priests in churches are opening Christmas (charity) boxes to distribute their contents between the poor and needy.

Take a time leap of 200 years, and embrace the Boxing Day mayhem of 21st century Britain; it is centered round the new worshiped Trinity; shop, shop, shop!

Queues and queues of people are filling the streets; the shops; fighting their way to grab the best bargain on a (Wii)game, a (NEXT) blouse or that (ARGOS) HD TV.

The January sales they call it, it’s January blues for me! As if people haven’t spent their last penny on Christmas gifts already, they’re tempted now to drain their credit accounts even more with what may look like a good bargain.

Shopping is being enrooted in the British culture by a capitalist corporate society, where it is practiced as a religion that heals the soul for which the term “retail therapy” is widely used!
You’re just back from the shops after maneuvering half an hour of allocating a parking space, two hours struggling to find what you need in the labyrinth of the supermarket isles, and another half an hour at the till. You turn on the Telly, and yet again, more shopping: a woman is advising on how to get the best bargain for your winter wardrobe, well, give me a break! Even the children programs are interrupted every 15 minutes to present adverts for endless demands and shopping lists!

Can shopping really feed the souls of the British, is it therapeutical as they claim? Can one never have enough Play Station games? Nike trainers? Football teamwear?

The problem with the British society today, as with most of other nations, really, is the new money culture; the material way of thinking, where either you Have or Have not. People are consumed by capitalism after fighting it for many centuries. Where nations like France, fought all means of social discrimination when they announced their revolution in 1789, where no more giving to the rich and taking from the poor is allowed. We are now doing the exact opposite; we are the new slaves of capitalism, where the money power franchises and brands are getting stronger and richer everyday. Thanks to shopping alcoholics who spend and spend more and more, and empower the business mentality to take over, demolishing all the virtues of the dignified society we all wish to enjoy!

Billy Connolly Really Cracks Me Up!

Billy Connolly is a great Scottish comedian. I think that he represents Glasgow very well. He can be the guy that stacks up the shelves at ASDA, or that person from the local pub or even the taxi driver! In fact, anyone you meet in Glasgow can be a Billy Connolly project in progress, except that Billy has made it to international fame.

The most loveable thing about Glaswegian people is that; despite their long history of hard work, meager life and poverty, they have managed to excel in their cheerfulness and wit.
Glaswegians are up for a conversation anytime. They’re very friendly people with lots of stories to share; about their work, their neighbours, their grandweans..etc. It doenst matter to them if you’re a close friend or a complete stranger, you’ll enjoy a bit of true Scottish blather in a Glasgow patter style-the same style that shot Billy Connolly to fame, just anytime anywhere round Glasgow!

Three Projects…One Scotland!

The political furor over Donald Trump's plans to build a £500m golf course on the north-east coast of Scotland is, in my modest opinion, unjustifiable. I can totally understand the Scottish conservation and pride. However, I can’t come to terms with refusing an offer from the multi-billionaire tycoon to inject some money into some forgotten areas of Aberdeenshire? Truth is, that the councilor who cast the deciding vote to reject the scheme, was sacked by his colleagues. Yes, councilors voted by 26 to 10 to remove Martin Ford from his role as chairman of the infrastructure services committee. ..Fair enough, Mr Ford, may I say!

That brings to mind the last dispute over backing the bid of Glasgow to become the location for the UK’s first Las Vegas-style super-casino. Of course, Glasgow lost that bid to Manchester, because not enough Scottish officials supported that bid, which would have resulted in the creation of up to 2,500 jobs and an increase in visitor numbers to the city…shame! Although I am not very keen on the super-casino themes either, as they would cause crime and antisocial behavior to rise, and vulnerable groups of society like the young and the elderly, could be lured into gambling as a result, I am still in favor of the golf resort, though! A golf resort in Scotland is a fantastic idea; it will serve the community by providing job opportunities to the whole of Scotland, who can say no to such an initiative?


Another project that may not see the light, and that is for a six-star hotel in the city center area. Plans have been revealed yesterday for the £125m high-rise hotel, which will replace some vacant shop units in the area. The hotel is the vision of London-based businessman Charles Price, of Progress Property Developments. The 26-storey, six-star Argyle International, with 158 rooms and rooftop swimming pool, will occupy the corner of Argyle Street and Robertson Street, directly across from the SAS Radisson Hotel. The hotel will feature a range of facilities - expected to make it one of the most luxurious and well-equipped in the country…interesting!


The problem with the above three projects, according to many, is that they target an elite small segment of the Scottish community. How many poor people around Glasgow can afford to have dinners at the Argyle hotel, or play Golf at Mr Trump’s resort, or even try a bit of luck at the super-intended to be-casino? …None! All of these projects are foreign investment opportunities alien to the actual urban setting. None of these projects address the real needs of the Scottish community as a whole, and Glasgow’s own social problems in particular.
The Scots are sending a message that they’re not interested in any foreign investments, in a “keep yer money tae yer selves” sort of way!

Asthma Inhaler Anyone? Or a Vitamin D Supplement Will Just Do for Now??

Asthma.org.uk reports that there are 5.2 million people in the UK who are receiving treatment for asthma: 1.1 million children (1 in 10) and 4.1 million adults (1 in 12). Vitamin D deficiency is very common, and really worrying. It seems that lack of sunshine exposure, wet weather and stay in-door no-other-choice lifestyle just adds to the problem. Apparently, there are other complications of vitamin D deficiency, which includes rickets; a disease which causes bow legs, and surprisingly recorded the highest number of cases amongst the Asian community, due to darker skin colour: which reduces sunlight absorption. Worrying stats that makes me keenly tempted to just pack my cases, head back to the desert, build a wee shack and just spend the coming three years sun-bathing, to make up for all the sunshine and goodness I was denied here in Britain! not having a proper lavatory facility in the desert should be the last thing to worry about, or shouldn’t it???

Scottish Football Mania!

One thing I can’t understand, is the Scots obsession with football! Last night’s Celtic game with AC Milan recorded a triumph for Celtic as they qualified for the last 16 of the Champions League, thanks to a late goal from Scott McDonald. Not too many of the Scots I knew rejoiced though, as most of them were Rangers’ fans. However, nothing could stop the faithful Celtic fans from celebrating. As soon as the second Celtic goal hit Milan’s net, I could hear fireworks blasting everywhere!

It somehow reminded me of June 2006, following England's exit in the quarterfinals of the World Cup at the hands of Portugal. The atmosphere felt almost the same; a pure Scottish triumph; fire works lit up the sky!

Being a dedicated fan is something that is learnt from a very early age. You see babies wearing stripes from as early as a few months old! Supporting a team is like a rite of passage; a young boy may follow his Daddy’s rituals of wearing the stripes, watching the game on TV or going to see the match live. Later, he may join him at the pub, or go with his own peers to cheer his favourite team to victory.
A “football fan” for a Scot is an honoury title; it gives a Scot self empowerment and a feeling of big achievement.
No mum or Dad is more proud than those of a football player. All the Scots want their children to play football; it’s every young boy’s dream.

Football has become an institutionalized sport in the UK in general, and in Scotland in particular. The Major matches are almost national holidays, with nearly all fans maneuvering ways to, almost religiously, watch the game live. It is the trademark of British “yob” culture, a big religion that swept the nation off its feet, and knocked down what was left of British saneness!

Food, Glorious Food!

When the French President Jacques Chirac made his famous comments about British food in the run-up to the G8 summit in Scotland in the summer of 2005, the British media went ballistic!! He actually declared to one of the papers that “the only thing that the English have ever done for European agriculture is mad cow disease”!!



The poor French president must be a man who honors good food, and who doesn’t? Surely British food is not on top of anybody’s favorites; and when it comes to food, who better to judge than the Brits all time favorite enemy: The French; who- to the Brits misfortune- possess one of the most refined cuisines of the world.

Thinking about British food, the first thing that comes to mind is, of course, Fish and Chips; the British traditional classic, which is alright! Then there is roast beef, sausages or any other cooked meat, served with a poor selection of vegetables, and some sauce or gravy. Full British Breakfast may include a variety of sausages, ham, baked beans, poached eggs and some toast, which fails to impress in any way! Pies are ugly variations of pastry and bad choices of fillings. Puddings, in general, lack the kick that you acquire from a sweet dish, they are very plain and ordinary.



Problem with British food is that it fails to impress; it is very straight to the point and not well- presented.

Coming to Britain from the Middle East, is a big transformation. Food in the Middle East is heritage, and cooking is a way of life. The British can never understand this because they come from a first world background, where the pace of life is quicker than spending time roasting onions, or boiling rice. Fortunately for us (Third World people), food is priority, and cooking is art.
We celebrate our food, and we socialize through eating together.

The British have borrowed most of their modern cuisine dishes; the most famous of all is curry, the classic Indian dish.

Aisles in supermarkets are filled with ready meals from all around the world. You can choose whatever tickles your fancy from hundreds and hundreds of different recipes. Unfortunately, these super market versions, although nicely-packed and perfectly how-to-cook instructed, lack the taste, aroma, and nutritional value of home made versions.

The island geography and climate affect food and agricultural produce, that’s why it’s rather common to find Jaffa oranges, Spanish tomatoes, Italian apples, Moroccan green beans, and many other international produce in retail in local shops and supermarkets here. All the imported-usually shipped- food produce never tastes as good as it does when it is freshly picked; Its sprayed with tens of pesticides in order for it to make it through to Britain. Local produce is discouraged, because of the high cost, so big supermarket chains rely on imported low quality food.

Consider your self lucky if you’re living in a place, where food is abundant, and where women still enjoy cooking for their families. If you were like me, a person from the Middle East, consider your self even luckier, that you still enjoy the delicacy of the simple life, and that your life is not yet as fast, as complicated, and as fast rhythmic as the British way of life!

Charles Rennie Mackintosh and the Glasgow Style

In the mid 1890s four Glaswegians; Charles Rennie Mackintosh, and his fellow apprentice architect James Herbert McNair in the Glasgow practice of Honeyman and Keppie, and Margaret Macdonald and her sister Frances - who were day students at the Glasgow School of Art , later to be known as the “The Glasgow Four” have entered into an informal alliance. This alliance of the two couples - as McNair was later to marry Frances Macdonald in 1899 and Mackintosh to marry Margaret in 1900 - has produced innovative and creative designs; and probably transformed the art and design scene in Glasgow to this day.




Charles Rennie Mackintosh style proposed a revolution against the Victorian style that dubbed the city with its geometric shapes and lines, in favour of more curvatures and free lines of the Art Nouveau movement.

The Clyde

The Clyde is the backdrop to every story the city has to tell of the past two centuries. If Glasgow was considered the Second city of the empire, it was something that the Clyde had to take credit for.
The impact of the Clyde on the city of Glasgow took many forms, its role as a highway to the world and a birthplace for the great ships, allowed Glasgow to become the “Second City of the Empire”.




The Clyde brought wealth, prosperity, employment and opportunity.

The Clyde, the shipyards, the tenements that housed the shipyard workers and the markets that sold them goods have all made Glasgow. It's funny though, how the Clyde is not present in the life of the city anymore.
The Clyde is now abandoned, desolated from the culmination of city life, into humble occasional river festivals, postcard pictures and as a mere background to new waterfront architectural projects. Isn't the Clyde worth more efforts from the city officials, or am I just being too romantic?!

Glasgow Green

The park (usually the Green or Glasgow Green), was the place where people used to escape the compact and over-crowded life of the tenement. it’s the place where they used to run as fast as they could, breath the freshest of air, lie flat on the grass, with arms and legs stretched, without the fear of bumping into someone or something in the tight rooms of the tenement. I’ve never lived in a tenement, but I can imagine how it must have felt for them.

Glasgow Green was more than just an open space in a city; it was where people have lived their dreams, and embraced their creativity, freedom, and the strong will to live without boundaries or walls (tenement walls of course).
The Green speaks more of Glasgow than any historian could. It reflects how the city’s social, economical and political life has developed over the centuries.

The Police State "See"CTV: Big Brother is Watching Britain

In Britain there are over 1.5 million closed-circuit television monitoring systems watching roads, shopping malls, schools and parking lots, yet crime is on the up and up, including armed robbery and homicide. Britain is the most monitored country on earth and yet the government plans to spend a further £70 million to buy yet more eyes in the sky. In my Neighbourhood alone, there are about 4 in less than 0.5 miles walking distance. The government argues that the people ask for it, irony is, bad guys never mind these cameras, all they need to do is put their hoodies on when conducting mischief. Pathetic, but true!

Urban Image

When you wander in the city for the first time, you can’t help but notice that the way Glasgow was built is not at all what the people had hoped for, it is something that was imposed on their lives for a large number of years.
The tenements, the high-rise flats, and all other faux pas of previous monstrous design policies, has definitely shaped the city’s whole urban image.

What Makes The British Proud?

So, they may have conquered the world! Built the largest empire the world had ever known where the sun never set! Where at one point it controlled a population of about 458 million people, approximately one-quarter of the world's population! and covered about 36.6 million km²-about a quarter of Earth's total land area!!! But that was history,what is it then that still make the British proud??

I've been meaning to combine a list of the things that I think still make the british proud of themselves and of their country. After various analyzations and observations it looked something like this:


1) English Language and Literature
English is the world’s official language (Some Scottish people might be offended by this, as they refer to their language as Scottish not English). It is the dominant international language in business, communications, science, aviation, entertainment, radio, politics and diplomacy. English is a versatile, easily structured language. Compared with Arabic, for example, it is the best to use in order to express specific meanings, as in Arabic the same words will interpret different meanings depending on the phrase structure and the use of associations that can build up one argument and simultaneously create a parallel implied argument that says something else, simply because Arabic is more rhetorical- which makes it unique as well.

It is a different story for English though, as words usually convey specific meanings. As an example of this, here is how you can play on meaning using different words of English:
When trying to (let a liquid material out) of a container with a small opening, different words are used to interpret different meanings, depending on the quantity of the liquid material, the frequency or the speed of falling onto a surface, and the shape of marks or spots that result from that.
e.g
Spatter: to spurt forth in scattered drops
Drip: to let fall in drops
Dribble: to fall or flow in drops or in a thin intermittent stream
Squiggle: a short wavy twist or line
Squirt: to come forth in a sudden rapid stream from a narrow opening
Dollop: an indefinite often-large quantity especially of something liquid

The English language is extraordinary rich, subtle, flexible and most importantly, perhaps, is its capacity to absorb foreign vocabulary and make it its own. I had just come from a region that encourages the use of the Arabic language, and consider the people who opt for English as snobs that abandon the language of the ancestors, and thus all the heritage and culture that comes with it. And here I was in Britain, a country whose language seemed fearless of other cultures' intrusions. I was impressed!
As for the English literature, it is well renowned throughout history. William Shakespeare was a playwright and poet whose body of works is considered the greatest in English literature. He wrote dozens of plays which continue to dominate world theater 400 years later. Even in modern day literature, J.K. Rowling is the famous author behind the Harry Potter fantasy books, which have gained worldwide attention, won multiple awards, and sold nearly 400 million copies worldwide. Robert Burns is still celebrated in Scotland on Burns Night on January 25th, as the number one Scottish poet. Haggis and Scotch whiskey may be served on special poetry suppers as part of the celebration.

I wish that we could do as good, and celebrate one of our famous icons like Shawqi for example, on a special day like the Scots do on Burns Night. It doesn’t take much effort to teach people how to take pride in their own culture and heritage. I guess that’s one big reason why they’re really proud to be British!


2) British Manners



The Brits are world-famous for their politness and self discipline. They may be considered reserved when it comes to manners and social situations. Some would question that the current generations of Britons may lack some of the well-renowned reputation of their ancestors. All in all the following manners are still considered basic forms of behaviour in the UK, which I find quite remarkable

-Queueing: The Brits are ranked as the best queuers in the world; they queue better than penguins or lemmings! People are expected to form orderly queues, whenever required, and wait for their turn patiently, as queue jumping will be frowned upon and considered rude and irresponsible.

-Holding the door open: Men and women both hold the door open for each other. It depends on who goes through the door first, and it's a great manner of showing respect for others.

-Driving in the UK is a stress free experience, although driving on the left side of the road, is largely argued, simply because the rest of the world doesn’t! But, one respects the ultimate pride of the Brits who continue to drive on the left side of the road, use the Pound Sterling instead of the Euro and never consider a better place to be than their beloved Britannia!
Whilst driving in the UK, I especially like how people wait patiently for others, flash their headlights for them to pass and how they raise their hand to say thank you. Simple things like that, makes the UK a great place to enjoy driving in, compared to Jordan, for example! In Jordan, unfortunately, driving is based on the “survival of the fittest” paradigm! If you can define fitness in words like; impatient, intolerable of others, and sadly, irresponsible

-Apologizing: "This is Britain, where people apologize to lamp-posts after bumping into them"...true! "I am so awfully sorry that", "I am afraid this", are some of the classic phrases used by the British. More is the use of the double negatives in speech, ie, " I don't disagree with you", " I would never want not to see you"...so considerate!

3) The British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC)



Probably the greatest institution in Britain, make that the world! These three letters; so powerful, so precise, they represent Britain with yet a new notion of greatness. Since I was little, the BBC has always been a favourite in our household. My dad hardly missed the daily news round-up broadcast by its world service radio.
The BBC, being the British institution that belonged to the world, is the definition of responsible and informative media. The most interesting thing about the British television is the role it plays in people’s daily lives, no wonder people used to refer to the BBC using the nickname “The Auntie” Well, after all “Auntie knows best!”

The British documentaries are the best. The Brits have a non-surpassable talent in documenting everything! They can do a program about socks, and it will still keep you at the edge of your seat! They somehow perfect storytelling in a way that amuses and informs.

The new service provided by the BBC; the iplayer is yet another great milestone in its prosperous history, you can use this service online to access your favourite program throughout the week, in case you missed any. These people at the BBC always make sure that the British public will only eat, breathe and watch BBC!


4) The National Health Service (NHS)



Yet another British Institution, one that makes the British really proud of their nationality. Despite the big muddle surrounding it, as being inefficient; corrupt; bankrupt; struggling to cope; swamped with foreign doctors and nurses; lagging behind other health systems and that the boost in funds provided under Labour has made no difference-no good news for the British tax-payer-but, after all, it’s a free national service, and it’s there for all the British 24/7.

According to the World Health Organization, the UK enjoys a total expenditure of $ 2,560 on health per capita, the US spends $ 6,090 per capita, while France spends $ 3,040. In the Middle East it's a different story: Jordan spends $ 502 per capita, while the wealthy UAE spends a mere $ 503 per capita on health. In the UK, life expectancy at birth for m/f is estimated at 77/81, for France it is 77/84, for the US 75/80, for Jordan (shocking!) 69/73 and for UAE 76/79. In Jordan, there are (26) per 1000 births dying under 5. For the UK, the number is (6), for France it is (5), for US it is (8), and for UAE it is estimated at (9) per 1000 births.It seems that the NHS is doing well after all! Not up to the expectations of many British perfectionists, but they can still lay rest the worries of having adequate health care available to them when they're old, vulnerable, skint, "white", "coloured", non-employed, stabbed, successful, losers,... it does not really matter. What matters is, that they happen to be in Britain, and they happen to be in need!

5)The Respect of Hierarchy

What’s fascinating about the British is their great respect for hierarchy: every one seems to know where he/she stands in society; ultimately identifying with their roles, their boundaries and responsibilities.
Hierarchy is very important to the stability of the British society. In fact, it’s important to the stability of any society. Everyone seems to be at ease with own bosses, leaders and authoritical figures. The state governs day-to-day lives of people, with or without direct interaction, and every British citizen is in fact responding consequently to the organizational control of the state with full consent.

6)The Monarchy

All Brits take pride in their monarchy, and especially in their Queen (Elizabeth II). If you have seen The Royal Family at Work, you would have learned a great deal about how every thing in Britain revolves around one person only; and that is the Queen. The queen is holy; majestic; not in a clichéd manner, but in every true sense of the word. The program shows every one waiting hand and foot on their dear queen; even the PM was shivering and trembling whilst delivering his speech in front of her majesty. Had it not been Queen Elizabeth; the regnant ruler of Britain, and 16 other commonwealth countries, things might have been easier for Mr. Brown.


7) The Union Jack



I think the Union Jack is a source of pride for the British, it symbolizes the unity of two nations: England and Scotland- overcoming years of blood and war that shaped the history of the two neighbours.

8) The "Multicultural" Society
Although a highly controversial issue; especially when it comes to internal politics in Britain. A carefully touched upon term mainly when political correctness is concerned. Nevertheless, I think Multicultural Britain should be celebrated; where people from different cultural, ethnic and religious backgrounds coexist in harmony, without any apparent tensions; things that might have triggered civil war somewhere else in the world.

9) The Army and War Machine
My memory can't serve me to suggest a single time, when actually Britain wasn't at war at some point in its history. Winston Churchill; arguably a British war hero, once said: " Battles are won by slaughter and maneuver. The greater the general, the more he contributes in maneuver, the less he demands in slaughter."

10) British Boy Bands
Britain: Home to the greatest Boy Bands of all times: The Beatles, Queen, Rolling Stones, ColdPlay, Westlife, BoyZone, Take That,... to name but a few!

Weather and Birds!

I like the tranquility of the Scottish landscape…but you need to pick the right weather to happily enjoy it- which is really rare!! As Sir David Frost once said: “There are two seasons in Britain; winter… and July!!” which is absolutely true!! Oh, bless him, he must have said that before moving to Al-Jazeerah to warm-up his soul and his wallet!! Talk about good old Englishmen and “generous” Qataris!!





While the birds are really beautiful in this country, the secret I think is good diet! I bet that thousands and thousands of loaves of bread are thrown to these birds each year. Someone once suggested- a governmental official actually, that they might as well use dead bodies (God forbid) to feed the birdies! Since they have got too many birds in here! Well, Britain is an island (which is shrinking according to global warming advocates, but that’s another story!) and since land values hit roof top here, people struggle to find empty lots to bury their loved ones, and it costs as little as ₤1000, that’s if you were lucky enough to get buried at all! That’s why many dead people get cremated simply because it’s cheaper! Of course, this thought is morally and religiously absurd, and can send shivers down the spine of any human being. But that’s just how things work in british life! It always starts as an idea, a crazy one, possibly, may be a newspaper survey, conducted by a certain think-tank, then it is passed on as a law by which all must abide! Well, sometimes you blow a big sigh of relief and just thank God for Jordan!!

First Impression

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It was night time when I first arrived in Glasgow; cutting through Junction (19) of the (M8) motorway towards the down town, and the first thing I noticed was the Old Royal Infirmary building, standing up as history testament to more than 200 years of Glasgow history.


“This city is really old!" was the first thought on my mind, being used to mono-chrome colored city of Amman, with it’s distinguished white stone buildings.
I could see how the streets were articulated round the existing buildings, with huge respect and consideration. The “old and the new” were blended together in beautiful harmony around every corner of the city, where the “new” is shiny and flawless, and the “old” is presiding with dominant sublime!